Mon, 6th June 2011, 8:41pm
My wife suffers - the most recent diagnosis is bi-polar, but we have also had diagnoses of depression, post-natal depression, and post traumatic stress disorder. She also has physical issues, gluten intolerant, lactose intolerant, what I would describe as Chronic-fatigue....
Before she me me, she was in a long term abusive relationship, And before that, she was brought up in a very broken home, self-absorbed mother - neglected kids, made a ward of the state...
Anyway - there are definately reasons in her life to have some serious issues, and I have chosen to walk the path forward with her. I try to be supportive. I really do.
MOST weeks are good, but my wife lost her brother recently, which was the start a bad few weeks. She's really detached from us at the moment. Smiles and pretends, but is not in the same place as us.
I come home from full day at work, have to clean the kitchen, cook us all dinner, amuse the kids, get them clean and in bed, and she sits there, thanking me, getting guilty, but not able to get up and help. Some days it's like she is just wallowing in her own self-pity, and I dont blame her , but i just cant *fix* it. I wish I could.
I cant say anything, or I sound patronising and she gets more depressed, or worse, she gets angry AND depressed.
So i walk on egg-shells, work my arse off, and then hope she feels like going to bed early so I can get an hour to myself without having to be "on-duty".
Ialso run a home business part time for some extra cash - so there are days when I have to doe 90% of the house work, AND a full time job, and a part timejob. Bed at midnight or 1am, up at 6am, and do it all again.
MOST days, I'm good. Today, I'm stuffed, and I'm over it.
She's gone out go for a drive tonight and listen to some music which sometimes helps.
So I thought I'd just have a vent. Sorry. :)